Facing the Mirror

Facing the mirror, a symbolic phrase meaning to take stock of one's self.

What does a Jedi see in the mirror? It depends on the Jedi.

If it's Qui-Gon Jinn, he sees beyond his rugged features to see a Jedi Knight, one who is calm and satisfied with his decisions, even those that don't agree with the Jedi Council. Qui-Gon is a man at peace with himself, knowing that he's always done what he felt was right.

If it's Obi-Wan Kenobi, a young man very sure of himself, he doesn't even see the handsome visage, the sparkly blue eyes ... sorry, I digress. Within Obi-Wan there lies a Jedi Master: loyal, honest, brave, and dedicated to peace and justice.

Anakin would probably say he saw the same, but in truth, in his arrogance, he saw someone who was better than everyone else.

But after Mustafar, everything changed. Obi-Wan saw himself as a failure. Unjustifiably so, IMO, but he accepted much blame for Anakin's downfall upon himself.

I wonder if Vader looked at himself in a mirror in the literal sense, gazing upon his ghastly scars and fueling his anger and hatred, giving himself strength in the dark side.

But if he'd looked deeper, would he have seen what he truly was, the epitome of evil, a being driven by darkness and selfishness?


Now we come to Luke.

Luke Skywalker, the Jedi's brightest star, a man whose light shines like a beacon in the blackest night, is probably the most humble and modest of all the Jedi.

But his greatest fear, the fear that haunts him throughout his life, is the fear that he will become like his father.

In the cave on Dagobah, he faces that fear, his vision like a mirror, a mirror to a future that he feared.

But he went on to Cloud City and faced his fears, only to have the fear reinforced by Vader himself. "No, I am your father."

And yet he survives, choosing to let the Force determine his fate rather than go with Vader. He will not turn to the dark side no matter what.

The next few months after that must have been a troubling time for Luke, a time filled with doubts and pain, yet he emerges stronger and more determined that ever.

He surrenders to the Imperials rather than endanger the Endor mission, and once again lets the Force determine his fate, for he will not turn, trusting that there is still good in his father.

Luke's moment of truth comes when he has Vader down, beaten, helpless. He could easily have killed him at the moment, but he stops when he sees the mechanical hand. Another mirror. This could be me, he thinks. I will NOT go there!

So then we come to this moment: He sees his father's horrendously scarred features, and he has a glimpse of the suffering that drove Vader's relentless reign of terror. And although he knows that Anakin brought it upon himself, his compassion is boundless and sees the father he never knew, the good man who he once was.

And as Anakin calls him "son" for the first time, Luke realizes that he was right, there was still good in him. And he sees that he himself is truly a good person, a true Jedi Knight.

This is the final trial of Luke Skywalker, and he passes with flying colors. His thoughts and feelings are clear, and he can go forth with a clean conscience, and the self-assurance he has earned in his journey into Jedi Knighthood.

A Jedi unlike his father before him.

I leave you with this poem, from my dearest friend Jedi Master Mina:

I am a Jedi Knight
Lost, confused and feeling weak
Struggling to battle aggressions to fight
Driven to push beyond this feat

Massive training, I will undergo
Do it trembling if I must
My Gnostic powers will continue to grow
"Master" of the Force is what I lust

Tear my flesh with such strife
Battle the dark side without delight
I bear this burden throughout my life
The hunger grows to honor this fight

Strip my courage from its place
Await safe haven for my devour
I'll stand and deliver with dignified grace
As I dive into this awesome power

Test my skill, if you may
Fatigued and battered, my spirit will lift
I will not become a wounded prey
For I call upon this special gift

Forced to reflect upon this mirror
I ponder thoughts which can't express
Passed the trails without shame or fear
Behold a Jedi Master the Force has blessed

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, Master!

It's About Forgiveness

It's all about forgiveness. And you have to be ready for it.

I recently read "The Life and Legend of Obi-Wan Kenobi". It's pretty good, for a kid's book. And I love Obi-Wan, so I HAD to read it.

There's a particular scene that's sticking with me: Obi-Wan, during his exile on Tatooine, comes across the remains of a Tusken camp. He suddenly realizes, with the help of the Force, that this is where Shmi Skywalker died, and that the darkness he senses is from Anakin's rampage.

He is angry with Qui-Gon, or rather Qui-Gon's ghost, for not telling him. Qui-Gon tells him that he kept it from him for the same reason he keeps the truth of Luke's father to himself. He wasn't ready.

Well, Obi-Wan is ticked off, and Qui-Gon tells him he still isn't ready, and vanishes.

How rude! Well, he was right, Obi-Wan wasn't ready. Why? He finds out after his death, at the time of Anakin's death, when he reaches out to his former Padawan and saves him from oblivion.

"Why me, Master?" Anakin asks in his contrition.

And at the moment Obi-Wan realizes that it wasn't the knowledge that he wasn't ready for, it was forgiveness. He wasn't ready to forgive Anakin until that moment.

But I wonder something. How could he forgive him? How could anyone forgive such betrayal, and the atrocities that followed? Was saving Luke enough to redeem him for everything he'd done?

Or was it as Obi-Wan answered him, "Because you ended the horror."

Well, that maybe true, but you're a better person that I am, Obi-Wan. I would have let him rot in all nine of the Corellian hells. Oh, I can let things go... go past that is, and move on, but I can hold a grudge for a long time!

Perhaps it's the Jedi way. Or perhaps it's the heart and wisdom of Obi-Wan.

Whatever it is, it's beyond my comprehension!